today was a day of organising and decluttering, long overdue. those who’ve been to our flat in person will find it hard to believe – because our place is so small, we’re constantly tidying up. and yet, look below the surface clean, and there is chaos.

it’s so strange to me, this instinctive human impulse for accumulation – in spite of all our best efforts, we acquire layers of possessions, nests of debris. like shed skins, we pile up these papers and mementos, tchotchke, odds and ends, bits and bobs. things past usage, things saved for future. piles of bills, old cds, random wires, singular socks, wrapping paper, plastic bags. spatula handles, popped lightbulbs, class notebooks, cat fur, bedraggled scarves, important newspaper clippings. stray mints, plug adapters, lip balm, couch cushion change, empty shampoo bottles, dead plant leaves, damp towels.

i’ve completely purged my belongings twice in the last 6 years. and yet somehow, i have so much *stuff*.

i have a theory that most people can be categorised as “savers” or “throwers”, and that the two types tend to end up pairing off in couples. i am a thrower, j is a saver. between us, somehow we strike a kind of uneasy balance.

and yet, even as ruthless as i can be about getting rid of random *things*, they collect. they gather in the back of drawers and closets. they pool in the hidden corners of the room, conglomerating through the magnetic attraction of dust and static. creating small planets of mass which exert a gravitational force on other free-floating loose ends. gradually intruding ever so stealthily on the clean, open spaces. the accretion of detritus, cluttering up the fringes of everything.

until i can stand it no more, and am forced to spend the entire day with shredders, brooms and bins, scouring the dark nooks and crannies, mercilessly cleansing and exorcising. and then the cycle begins again.

zookeeper – i live in the mess you are

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