According to the Blogosphere (and y’all know how reliable *that* is!), it’s National De-lurking Week (which nation? who knows? who cares?)
interesting concept, though. anyone want to de-lurk? any sneaky readers out there? i promise i don’t bite!
national de-lurking week I swear, I sometimes just do not for the life of me understand how a country which is trying to arrest suspects *before* they commit a crime (obviously *someone* in the home office was watching “minority report“), collect baby’s dna just in case they grow up to be criminals, and i.d. every innocent citizen to prove they’re *not* criminals… how on earth they can let *real criminals* (including murderers!) just roam free completely undocumented?!?!
but that’s okay – i feel much safer since I can get my terrorism alerts via email.
open jails, i.d. cards, baby dna, escaped prisoners yes, yes, yes: this article articulates *exactly* what I was trying to say before about the ashley case:
I understand the parents’ logic. And I can even understand how a medical team might come to agree that a person who cannot move will have a better life small than big. But I think the Peter Pan option is morally wrong.
I believe it is true that it is easier to move Ashley about if she is the size of a 6-year-old. But I also believe that a decent society should be able to provide appropriately sized wheelchairs and bathtubs and home-health assistance to families like this one. Keeping Ashley small is a pharmacological solution for a social failure — the fact that American society does not do what it should to help severely disabled children and their families.
True, it may be better if Ashley does not become sexually developed in terms of protecting her from attack. But that can be said of any woman. To surgically remove her breasts is simply to maim her in a way that ought not be done. She needs a safe environment at home and if the day comes, a safe environment in an institution. Lopping off her breasts to keep her safe cannot be the right or the only answer.
(emphasis mine)
ashley, disabilities, stunted growth a little music to get the blood moving and banish the chills
winter warmers – featuring yellowcard, nine inch nails, strung out and more.
here’s the 
.
Happy bloggiversary to me! Jen’s Den is officially 3 years old today. Though I love that there are a small handful of regular readers, y’all know I don’t do it for you – but I do very much appreciate everyone who reads and comments. Youz guyz make the internetz much more fun to hang out in.
Good things still to come ahead – so stick around.
On an entirely different topic, the nfl playoffs start this weekend, and my beloved patriots face off against the hated nj jets.
go pats!
bloggiversary everyone who reads this blog knows full well how i feel about the death penalty, and saddam hussein in particular. But if you ever needed even further argument against public execution, here’s one:
three kids die imitating saddam hussein’s hanging.
i’ve said it numerous times here. violence begets more violence, killing begets more killing. you reap what you sow – even when it’s something as tragic as death. but children should never have to be the victims.
death penalty, saddam hussein, public execution why oh why do 9o% of bras here in london have padding? I got enough up front, thanks – i just want to keep it from bouncing all over the place. lift and separate. not accentuate. why is that so hard?
there was a news story out today about a girl with profound disabilities whose parents have elected to permanently stunt her growth.
Parents of a severely disabled girl in the US have revealed that they are keeping her child-sized in order to give her a better life.
The nine-year-old, named Ashley, has the mental ability of a three-month-old baby and cannot walk or talk.Her parents decided on a course of treatment for her which has involved hormone doses to limit her growth, as well as uterine and breast surgery.
They say the treatment will help to improve her quality of life.
I can’t begin to say how appalling I find this. As someone who has worked for people with disabilities for virutally my entire career, (including many years of physical assistance for adults – cleaning, feeding, dressing and toileting), I find it completely unconscionable that we’re willing to allow this to be done. And the most galling bit is that as a society we would never in a million years allow this to happen to someone without learning disabilities.
She doesn’t have the mind of a three month old – she has the mind of a 9 year old with profound learning disabilities. And so pretending that it’s fine because people who don’t understand learning disabilities interpret it as simply “matching a body to a mental age” is to deprive this girl of the right to be who she truly is – a girl who will eventually be a woman, whether she physically grows or not. As a human she has the right to primacy and control of her own body. She has the right to experience adulthood and fertility, even if she can’t understand them.
There are millions of adults with limited or no mobility, who get around and experience life – most of them *don’t* have learning disabilities. Should they have been kept stunted and asexual? Would anyone dare to suggest they should have?
Some have made the argument that the girl will get better care if she is physically small – that this will allow the parents to keep her out of crappy state care.
The fact that some people get crappy care, however, (and admittedly some do), is not reason enough to try to make caring for people with disabilities easier for us by *changing the person with the disability* . We don’t get to electively take away someone’s development and strip them of their sexuality, simply because we can’t improve our care systems. We don’t get to go changing the person with the disability simply because it’s easier than changing the support structures which are broken. We shouldn’t get to take away someone’s right to be who they were intended because of our own fears and failings.
If we do that, we’ve failed them twice.
(And let me be clear – I’m not passing judgement on the parents, as misguided as this is. Every parent has differing abilites to cope – though I’ve known many who did more than I ever could (I am reminded of a widowed mother I worked with who had 3 adult children with profound disabilities living with her at home and still remained cheery!) I *am*, however passing judgement on the doctors who decided to go along with this. They’ve set a dangerous precedent, and as medical professionals should know better.)
ashley, disabilities, , stunted growth, learning disabilities my husband is trying to divorce me – at least that’s the message i get from the fact that this is the 3rd time he’s tried to lose his wedding ring.
we were in datong, china, in this tiny little hellhole of a hotel room when it first happened. very suddenly, he realised it was no longer on his finger, and we searched, panicked, high and low to no avail. finally i remembered him digging deep in his rucksack and suggested it might have fallen off in there. luckily he found it at the bottom of the pack, and we breathed a sigh of relief.
turns out his fingers seem to have lost weight (though the rest of him has stayed the same!) when i first bought the ring, we’d had to have it re-sized smaller, and now it seemed like it needed to go smaller yet again. his amazing shrinking fingers were trying to shed the ring like a snake shedding a skin.
i suggested to j that he wrap a plaster around the back of it to keep it snug, but he didn’t like that suggestion. i suggested he just wear it on his right hand (with bigger fingers) until we got home to get it properly adjusted. he didn’t want to do that either. instead he went shopping and bought a cheap smaller “guard ring” to wear on top of it and keep it from slipping off.
that worked well – until the day he was in a public bathroom and they both fell off and the guard ring landed in the toilet. he didn’t bother retrieving the guard ring (surprisingly) and once again i suggested he wear it on his right hand until we got home, which he agreed to grudgingly.
since being home, however, he’s not yet gotten around to getting it adjusted – which wouldn’t bother me except that he still insists on trying to wear it on his left hand. several times i have noticed the ring back on his left hand, and moved it to his right ring finger, scolding him that he’d lose it if he didn’t get it re-sized first.
so this morning, as i was grabbing my bag from the coat rack on the way out the door, what did I see winking at me from the corner of the floor? his ring.
so i’m conducting a little experiment. he never reads my blog, even though he always *claims* he does, so if he actually reads this here his fears will be allayed knowing i have the ring safe and sound. but if he doesn’t read it here (and i am presuming he won’t) i’m curious to see how long it takes him to ‘fess up to losing it, yet again. anyone care to take a guess?
our anniversary is coming up soon – guess what i’ll be getting done for him as a gift?
a lot of the time, i’m a really sucky londoner – i rarely leave my little zone of work/home lately, and i almost never make it across the river into north london.
but there were two instances recently where i realised how much i’ve limited myself. first, we had dinner plans with friends down at gabriel’s wharf the other evening. they were a bit late arriving, and it was one of those really mild but windy nights that feel so invigorating your feet start to tingle. so we walked around the south bank, people watching, looking at all the lovely lights, listening to the water. i was so annoyed i didn’t have my camera with me because the christmas lights, and st. paul’s illuminated against the night sky, and the restaurants aglow were all so beautiful i just wanted to capture them. and i remembered other winter nights long ago, when i used to come down to the south bank, and how much i enjoyed it then. i’m not sure how or why i forgot to come down there anymore, but it made me sad that i let it drift away from me.
then again, today. i’d decided i needed to start taking my lunch hour and just get out of the office for some air (which i never do). so i walked across vauxhall bridge and wandered up past the tate museum, past gorgeous stately buildings and riverside gardens. i walked all the way up to the houses of parliament and westminster abbey, and it occurred to me that i hadn’t been near them in years probably. there was a shiny cold afternoon sun beaming down on the golden spires, and a stiff breeze coming off the water, and i had some amazing music playing on the ipod, and it struck me once again just how much i’ve taken london for granted lately. how little effort i put into taking part of this city i live in. the london eye was towering proudly and the graceful arch of bridges seemed to be keeping the two sides of the city from floating apart. there were buses and boats gliding by, and even the green monstrosity of the mi5 building and the looming hulk of the battersea power station seemed to claim their place in the landscape. i hadn’t bothered to pause and appreciate these things for ages – and it has been my loss. i’ve worked in the same location for a year, and never once explored what was at the doorstep.
i need to make the effort – because one day i won’t live here anymore, and you can’t miss what you don’t remember.
i was all set to write yet another scathing post about the increases on the tube (now at a lovely £4 [up 33%!!!], equivalent of nearly $8 just for a single journey into central london, and strikes scheduled for alter this month!!! what a fucking joke for a subway which barely even runs.)
but there’s this: will the massachusetts legislature have the courage of their convictions and refuse to call a vote on banning gay marriage under the state constitution, on this, the last day of the legislative session? will they have the courage to stand up for the rights of the 8,000 married gay couples who have been living in wedded bliss for two years?
The newly elected governor said this:
“This is not just another question for popular decision. This is a question, under the equal protection clause, about what freedoms the minority is entitled to,” Patrick told reporters after meeting with DiMasi. “This is the first time that the petition process has ever been used to consider reinserting discrimination into the constitution.”
The legislature has, to this point, tried to avoid a vote on the issue.
I can only hope they dig deep, consult their conscience, and do what they know in their heart to be right – to protect the rights of *all* massachusetts citizens, regardless of sexual orientation. everyone deserves the right to marry the person they love. gays deserve nothing less than what every other couple has – the right to be part of a legal family. the right to stand up before the world and be united and recognised and counted as equals.
so i only hope that the lawmakers of the state will take a few minutes to stop and think about what it feels like to fall head over heels in love and want to be married and live happily ever after with the person of their dreams. and then find the courage to stand their ground in the face of everyone who would want to tell others that they’re not entitled to that same dream – because they’re gay.
update: : 
igh:: clearly I overestimated their collective backbone…
Lawmakers in Massachusetts, the only state where gay marriage is legal, just voted to advance a proposed constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage, a critical step toward putting the measure on the 2008 ballot. The Legislature approved the measure 132-61. The initiative, which only needed 50 votes to pass, must still be passed in the next legislative session before it will be put on the ballot in 2008.
massachusetts, vote, gay marriage Just for the hell of it…
What did you do in 2006 that you’d never done before?
Too many things to list, so much of this year was a brand new adventure.
Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Hellz no. I leave things behind in the year past and look forward to the year to come. Anything else is a waste of time.
Did anyone close to you give birth?
Vanessa, Alex, and Nicola all had babies this year – must’ve been something in the water!
Did anyone close to you die?
Thank god, no. Please not this year either. J’s grandfather died while we were away.
What places did you visit?
Well, since you asked 
… China, Thailand, Laos, Vietnam, Cambodia, Singapore, Australia, Fiji, New Zealand, Chile, Bolivia, Peru, Costa Rica – strange lands and exotic experiences galore!
What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
Money. And some willpower would not go amiss.
What date from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory?
15 April – the day we got on the plane to leave. 4 Sept – the day a traumatic accident unfolded right before our eyes. 16 October – the day we got off the plane home.
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Beating J for the title of “Least Likely to Get Dodgy Tummy”! I’m gonna have a plaque made and hang it in the lounge. Also, not bludgeoning my husband with a thick “Lonely Planet”. That deserves honorary mention.
What was your biggest failure?
Failing to exercise. Like, at all. I spent most of the year on hiatus. Any exercise was completely accidental.
Did you suffer illness or injury?
No, thank god, given my natural klutziness. I thought for sure I was gonna tumble off the Great Wall of China and land in Mongolia, and J did get a scary fever in Laos where I had visions of bundling him on a plane back to Bangkok. But the most use the first aid kit got was J dipping into the Immodium stash.
What was the best thing you bought?
My travel towel – that thing rocks.
Whose behaviour merited celebration?
J’s – for putting up with my shit, day in, day out. The boy deserves a medal.
Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Every fucking politician I can think of.
Where did most of your money go?
Bus tickets
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The aforementioned RTW trip. Isn’t it obvious, given that I mention it every second sentence??
What song(s) will always remind you of 2006?
Anything Jack Johnson. In every single backpackers we stayed at.
Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? Happier
Thinner or fatter? I decline to answer
Richer or poorer? Poorer in money, richer in a million other ways
What do you wish you’d done more of?
Travel. And sex. More sex is always good.
What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worrying about money, and haggling. I suck at haggling.
What was the best book you read?
Goodness, I can’t remember the best, but I certainly remember a lot of bad ones. English books are scarce on the ground in China!
What did you want and get?
The trip of a lifetime. But that was through a lot of hard work.
What did you want and not get?
A winning lottery ticket.
What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Nothing. Really. It was a great year.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
“Five Easy Outfits”. I wore variations of the same five things every single day of the week. High fashion takes up too much room for a rucksack.
What kept you sane?
Who says I was sane?
What political issue stirred you the most?
The midterm elections stirred me like I haven’t been stirred in a long time.
Who did you miss?
Everyone we left behind.
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006:
Wherever you go, there you are.
new year, meme Ugh – I am dying.
If this is nature’s way of reminding us how bad alcohol is for one’s body, why on earth make it so yummy in the first place?!? Surely it would make much more evolutionary sense for alcohol to taste like the vile toxin it is, rather than like delicious liquid sunshine in a bottle…
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