thanksgiving dinner was lovely – amity made a wonderful dinner with all the traditionals (gorgeous turkey, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and glazed carrots) and I brought pumpkin and apple pie for dessert. good company, good food – it really felt like home away from home.

the only downer was having to keep the wine to a minimum, as i had an interview this morning for my old post and didn’t want to be muzzy-headed. i got the job (hooray!) so, (sadly) i’ll soon be back in the world of gainful employment. j will be thrilled – i think there must be nothing worse than having to get up early and face the cold wet morning while your spouse gets to stay snuggled up warm in bed. let’s just say he’s not been entirely successful at hiding his bitterness.

i’ll be back at work just in time for the department christmas ‘do, as my boss pointed out. i’ve been blocking the creeping approach of christmas from my mind, but now that thanksgiving is past, the merry season is well and truly underway. it started far too early here, with lights, decorations and adverts beginning weeks ago now. i’m even less enthusiastic than usual because this will be a rather spare christmas – the “family” are all headed off to snowboard or see relatives, and since we still haven’t got our financial feet back under us just yet, we’re not buying presents for each other. so it’ll be just the two of us with our thin cup of cheer. that sounds so very lonely.

i’ll also be another year older. 34 sounds dangerously close to “mid-thirties” and with each passing birthday, my mirror and mind are increasingly at odds with each other. add to that my usual patina of end-of-year wistfulness, and you begin to understand why i’m not looking forward to the next few weeks.

but even in the face of my determined maudlin musings, there is this: the annual blooming of my beloved christmas cactus. Like clockwork, its buds arrive to burst into vibrant colour just when it is greyest both outside and in. defying the clouds milling about in my head. tracey cared for it while we were away and proudly returned it to us when we got back. i love that little plant and it makes me happy to see that even in the winter bleakness, there are signs of renewal. something i need to bear in mind these days, and there’s nothing better than a beautiful flower as a reminder.

Like this post

Unlike